Local Heart, Global Soul

April 23, 2019

Laughingly Taking The Piss Out Of Your Pit Stop…

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

As with any large outdoor public gathering, the organisers of the event have to provide suitable restroom facilities.

In the case of the 2017 Food Truck festival in the Hague, the solution was the best I have ever seen.

Unbeknownst to me I had first contact with a member of this group was earlier at one of the food stands.

I spied a young lady in a sort of washer-woman costume, with curlers in her hair which was also wrapped up with a scarf and a sort of  long apron/over-all kind of caricature of the manner of 1930’s.

I asked if  I could take some photographs of her and she gladly obliged.

Later I noticed a large truck that had doors on the sides, these folded outwards to reveal a small passageway on one side of the truck and a row of toilet cubicles on the other.

It was like a cross between a series of upmarket port-a-loos, and normal toilet block.  Outside by the queue was  table where two ladies sat, and it turns out that the younger one of the two is the engagingly attired lady I had encountered earlier.

Together they were taking turns to organize the queue and keep the lavatories clean. I didn’t end up getting photographs of the large truck because there were too many parents taking young children to the toilet and with all of the comings and goings, I couldn’t satisfactorily edit them out of the shots.

I did however manage to take photograph of their company car.

This delightful vehicle was as ingenious as their attire:  nicknamed the “pleemobiel”  this is a kind of pun referencing the children’s toy brand of “Playmobile” (even the font is similar) but the “plee” part that the have changed is a cute/ funny nickname for pee, or urine.

The phrase “U plassie is ons passie” translates as “Your pee-pee is our passion” and the van is decorated with two ladies (Beb & Toos)decked out in the same attire as the younger and older lady at the table.

Their sense of humour carries on in the price cards on the table: for instance the one for Gents reads: “Beb & Toos (“Bezet” means “engaged/occupied”), Gentlemens Prices (tariffs): Is your “tokus” (slang for penis) shorter than 8cm ? Price: Euro 0.50 cents. (Is your tokus) longer … Price Euro 1.00

I showed Himself this and he laughed and said “Yes of course it’s meant to make men pay more because of pride and that they want people to think they have a big penis, but don’t forget, these men are also Dutch so I bet they will all go for the Euro 0.50 cent option simply because its cheaper an they want to save money“.

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

I think he’s probably right, but hey, can’t fault them for trying!

The other sign was more conventional: you could get a token for a “losse plas’, basically one single use of the toilets for 1/2 of  1 munt, or Euro 0.50 cents.

(The “munt’ = being the special tickets that are the ‘currency” of this event and which needed to be purchased at a separate counter in order to buy food and drinks at all of the food trucks participating at the festival.)

You could also purchase a “plas bandje”  (a wrist band) for 1 Munt or Euro 2.00, entitling one person to unlimited use of the facilities for the whole day.

The last alternative would be to buy for 2  Munt or Euro 4.00 the “Voordeel Plasskart” which turns out to be “10 x piddle/pee-pee/take a leak/ spend a penny etc  for the (whole?) Club”  I’m not certain how this works but somehow you are paying for use of the loos for 10 occasions … just not certain how the “group’ element fits into this arrangement!

I have to admit that I may also be confused because I think this is dialect Dutch: for instance in the Gents sign: the “usual’ spelling of the word ‘kleiner” (smaller) is spelled here as “kleinert” , and the word “groter” (larger) here as “grotert”

Since this event is also an evening event, with bar stalls that only started to open up later in the afternoon / early evening, and music areas that were largely unoccupied during our visit, but clearly being set up, it’s a definite bet that as the family crowd fade away for children’s bedtimes after a day of dinning and playing, the adult party crowd come in to take their place.

Once the booze starts flowing it would be safe to assume that the need to use the privy, and therefore the W.C.’s here could create quite a demand.. maybe these ladies, busy with everyone’s ablutions, can not only provide a needed service to the event but also end up creating a thriving business in the process… so that they end up going home rather flush! … And all of this whilst laughingly taking the piss out of your pit stop!

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

General prices…

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

Prices for Gents…

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

…And if you have read this far you may have noticed how many “Pee” and “Toilet” puns or nicknames I managed to squeeze into this post!

November 4, 2011

For when you need to Bolt to the Stable Door…

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

Here we are settling into our little last minute camping expedition at Kampeerbosje Leerdam. You know me, I like quirky and this place has more than it’s fair share of quirky bits so  lets take a look at one of them.

I mentioned in yesterdays post that a toilet was added to the  kitchen/ veranda part of the Pipo wagon accommodation recently this summer.

What I didn’t mention was the door to it… YES… another “loo with a view! ” to add to my collection.

This is definitely the first time I have ever seen a toilet that sported a stable door entry. In theory you could sit on the throne, open the  top half of the door and still carry on your conversation with those still sitting at the table on the veranda whilst you answered the call of nature… (yikes, even with just Himself and the kids you wouldn’t find me brave enough to do that on purpose!)

Like many parents of two children who have passed through the toddler stage I have been rudely interrupted on the toilet often enough in the past… just as you get seated and hope for a full two minutes of peace and quiet,  little fists start banging at the door with an  ” I’m, busting!” announcement  and the voice is insistent and whining in just the right measure that your heart sinks and you try and pee faster, rather than face the prospect of cleaning up their imminent mess.

The little stinkers must have radar, and apparently their bowel movement clocks are set to go off as soon as the noise of the toilet door being clicked shut by an adult reaches their ears. There’s no other way that I can fathom how regularly they “are busting to go” right at the same moment that my bare behind makes contact with the toilet seat.

I’ve spent occasions on the loo too with small child hanging onto the doorknob on the other side of the closed door, because it’s just them and me in the house  and they don’t want to “be alone“. (No, you are not alone, I am here through the door, I just want a few minutes peace to at least pee in private please). Said child would have happily sat on my knee during the process had I agreed (ha! No Way!).

That said, a “loo with a view” is a funny talking point… it made us giggle. Not needing the loo,  I took the camera inside, sat down and took a photo looking outside.

(photograph © Kiwidutch)

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